Has honesty gone out of fashion?

It has been said that we are living in a ‘post-truth’ era. So much so that post-truth was Oxford Dictionaries’ International word of 2016. Surely no coincidence that 2016 was also the year of Brexit and Donald Trump. It has become widespread practice for politicians and people in positions of trust to abuse their power to lie to the people that elect them. A large percentage of the general public are happy to base their political decisions on lies and propaganda that they are fed to them by the partisan media. One could argue it has always been this way, but surely the internet and social media have exacerbated the problem.

Is the problem that dishonesty is so much a part of our everyday culture that we cannot see that it could be any other way? We all lie, so why should we expect anyone to be above that? Perhaps herein lies the problem. A study in deception found that 60% of people cannot have a ten minute conversation without lying. Everywhere you look on social media - people are stating facts and figures which have no basis in truth. Or perhaps, even more so, showing snapshots of their life which portray a lie. Why do we feel the need to lie or mislead? Are we scared of the judgement of others, scared it will not get us what we ultimately want - professionally and personally? If our society rewards liars and manipulators, then what incentive is there to tell the truth? It appears that few are able to rely on their integrity when faced with the chance to advance their own agenda.

It is perhaps not so simple to say we should tell the truth all the time. I mean do we really need to tell Granny that the jumper she made for Christmas is never going to see the light of day? Or the colleague that kindly made cakes for the office that they were actually inedible?  With the intention only to spare the feelings of another, should we feel guilty for a little white lie? A study by the Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania gave participants a series of scenarios and asked them to judge the forms of lying as being good or bad. The study found that  'Individuals with altruistic intentions are perceived to be more moral, more benevolent, and more honest, even when they lie.'. The general opinion was that if the lie would benefit the person being lied to then it was 'good', but if it would have no effect or a negative effect on the person being lied to then it was 'bad'. This might be a good time to be honest with ourselves. How many times does the lie we tell really benefit the person we are lying to? If we are honest with ourselves, are the majority of lies not self-serving?

The key here may be in us all having a greater understanding of when we are being lied to and a person's motivation for doing so. Trust is an integral part of any relationship - family member, partner, friend, colleague. Once you break that down you are left with very little. It is time to realise that when we are hurt because we have been lied to or cheated by people we care about, the issue lies with their inability to confront the truth and we need to decide if there is space in our lives for those kind of people. They may have convinced themselves there is a good reason for the lie, but if the lie causes pain to another - there is no good reason. The people truly worth our time will make sure we don't have a reason to distrust them. Once we can balance this is in our everyday lives, perhaps we can finally feel more confident in holding people in positions of power to account. 

One of the worst things about the rise of dishonesty, appears to be the apathy we have developed to being lied to. We seem to expect this to be something that happens and just to accept it as the way things are. A case in point is the infamous Vote Leave campaign bus with the slogan 'We send the EU £350 million a week, let's fund our NHS instead'. Never mind that the UK doesn't send the EU £350 per week (official Treasury figures show that in 2016/17 the UK contribution was £156 million a week), but more importantly Vote Leave MPs have themselves said there was never any intention to transfer that money to the NHS instead and that it was just an 'example' of what could be done with the money. How incredibly naive to say it would not have been interpreted that way by a large percentage of the voting public. Why was there not widespread outrage that politicians feel the public could be lied to in such a way over such a big issue? Because we can be. Because really, we all expect it. 'All politicans are the same' - how many times have you heard that said? It's time we stop expecting the worst and start demanding more. If we cannot rely on people to tell us the truth, then we have a responsibility to educate ourselves more so that we know when we are being lied to and can judge our reaction accordingly.

How can you stay sane in the post truth era? It's certainly difficult for anyone that values the truth and honesty. However those people are the most valuable right now. I think we have to never stop challenging what we are told, but also never stop challenging ourselves and those around us to be better. If we look in the mirror at the end of the day, can we really feel happy that the person we represented to those around us was our true self? Now more than ever, we need people prepared to stand up for what is right. Telling the truth appears to have gone out of fashion lately, but like all good trends, I think it is time for a comeback.